Are You Dealing With Your Grief or Suppressing It?
Grief is complex. It is raw, unfiltered, and deeply personal. Yet, in a world that often prioritizes “moving on” over true healing, many of us struggle with how to navigate it.
Some avoid their grief altogether, mistaking emotional detachment for strength. Others harden their hearts, believing that feeling nothing is the only way to survive. But is that really healing? Or is it just avoidance in disguise?
The Truth About Avoidance
When we push grief aside, telling ourselves we’re “fine” or “too busy to deal with it,” we’re not healing—we’re avoiding. Suppressing emotions may work temporarily, but over time, buried grief manifests in other ways: anxiety, anger, physical illness, or even a persistent numbness that keeps us from fully experiencing life.
Grief, when ignored, doesn’t disappear. It waits. And it often resurfaces at unexpected times, sometimes in the form of unexplained sadness, frustration, or emotional detachment from the people and experiences that once brought us joy.
Feeling Isn’t Weakness—It’s Necessary for Healing
We live in a culture that sometimes equates resilience with stoicism. But true strength lies in allowing ourselves to feel. Grieving doesn’t mean we’re weak—it means we are human.
Hardening your heart might seem like a defense mechanism, but in reality, it creates distance—not just from pain but from love, joy, and connection as well. Emotions, no matter how difficult, need to be processed, not buried.
Managing Feelings: A Healthier Way to Grieve
Healing doesn’t mean the grief disappears; it means we learn to carry it differently. Managing our feelings allows us to process grief in a way that fosters growth instead of stagnation.
Here are three key steps to navigating grief in a way that leads to true healing:
1. Face Hard Truths
Grief often comes with painful realities: the finality of loss, the void left behind, and the fear of what comes next. Facing these truths rather than running from them is an essential step toward healing.
Ask yourself:
• What emotions am I avoiding?
• What truths am I struggling to accept?
• How is my grief showing up in my daily life?
Being honest about your feelings, even when they’re uncomfortable, is the first step toward healing.
2. Reframe Your Thoughts
Grief doesn’t mean life is over. While loss changes us, it doesn’t have to define us in a negative way. One of the most powerful ways to heal is to reframe our thoughts:
• Instead of “I’ll never be okay again,” try “I’m learning to live with my loss.”
• Instead of “I have to be strong,” try “It’s okay to feel weak sometimes.”
• Instead of “I lost everything,” try “I am finding new ways to honor and remember.”
Reframing doesn’t erase pain, but it helps shift perspective from despair to hope.
3. Choose to Live a Life You Love
Grief can make it feel impossible to move forward, but healing is not about forgetting—it’s about choosing to live again.
Living a life you love doesn’t mean you don’t miss what (or who) you lost. It means you are choosing to honor their memory by continuing to grow, love, and find joy where you can.
Ask yourself:
• What small steps can I take to care for myself today?
• How can I channel my grief into something meaningful?
• What would my loved one want for me?
Grief is not a destination—it’s a journey. And while it may never fully leave, it doesn’t have to control us.
Final Thoughts
Are you dealing with your grief, or are you suppressing it? Are you allowing yourself to feel, process, and heal, or are you pushing it away?
True healing comes from facing emotions head-on, reframing our thoughts, and choosing to keep living. It’s not about “getting over” loss but about learning to carry it in a way that allows us to still experience love, joy, and purpose.
Your grief matters. Your healing matters. And you are allowed to take the time you need. Just don’t let avoidance rob you of the life you still have to live.
If this resonates with you, I’d love to hear your thoughts. How have you been managing your grief? Let’s start a conversation.